Day 8

So today was very interesting, I felt like I was over eating but looking back it's not so bad. I did have a lot to drink though, alcohol wise, but it was fine and I go by if you don't have a hangover - you're good. But I had a lovely girlie night; painting my nails (twice) and watching Disney films. Anyway so I felt a bit bloated to do photos so they will be up tomorrow instead (it's not cheating - promise!)


Day 8

• 2 1/2 small pieces of pizza 

Day 8 photos up tomorrow


Night darlings

Emma xx

Day 7

Woke up with a really bad headache today, think its the nicotine deficiency and all my fat breaking down which is both annoying and welcomed :) Although I also can't poo which is very very annoying, because I probably weigh an extra stone in just the food that is stored in me! 


I have been very grumpy recently, but I think I'm allowed to be a little bit. I've given up everything I love! Or rather, I haven't had much of what I love! No smoking, little food, no sex (permanent time of the month - don't ask why), little caffeine, little sugar and little alcohol! So seeing as I haven't killed anyone yet, I think I'm doing quite well!


Also I am waiting for some coursework and exam marks so that might be why I'm not in a very good mood...but I did get two of my coursework marks back (waiting for another 3 and an exam now) and one was very low, but I still passed and I got a first in my other one!! Which was the hardest!! So I have cheered up a bit.


I have been a bit naughty today though - I ordered pizza hut...but I haven't had much of it at all! Just the smell was good enough to live on...every time I actually want a bit of pizza I have to remember my motivation points (the + points for being thin). To give you an idea;

• Hip bones
• Walking up hills
• Boyfriend to pick me up easy
• Wear a bikini and not want to hide
• To wear my favourite skirt again

But it seems like whenever you tell someone what you are doing, they automatically know more than you about it! And I just want to say "Yes, I do know what I am doing because I was there - you were not". Garghhhh it is so annoying! And by the way, I know exercise is healthy, but I'm still losing weight healthily even without exercise so PISS OFF! And most of the people who are telling me this aren't exactly in a state to tell me how to lose weight anyway...

Day 7

• Half a small fish sandwich
• 2 chicken wings
• 2 cheese triangles
• 1 piece of garlic bread 

I did feel a bit guilty about this at the time, but looking back at it - it's not bad at all...so I might treat myself later to half a piece of pizza if I get hungry again...

Look forward to tomorrows pictures!

Stay beautiful darlings!

Emma xx


**ps. I did have a very small piece of pizza as well a bit later**

Day 6

Still not feeling great but I need to get up and do some work and some washing and stuff so I am still alive :) Been almost a week now and am feeling pretty good, I have lots more energy and want to get out and dance and run.


Because I'm eating less I am also taking vitamins just to keep me healthy...these are;

• Omega 3
• Vitamin C & Zinc
• Echinacea
• Evening primrose oil
• Multi-vitamins & Iron
• Brewers yeast

Day 6 

• rest of chicken burger
• 1/2 doughnut 
• mini trifle 
• miso soup

For people who don't know, miso soup is only 28 calories and is practically flavoured water with some seaweed in the bottom - not to everyone's taste, but I love it.


Emma xx

Day 5

So today has been harder for a few reasons...The first is that I woke up feeling not very well, with a headache and a tummy ache and shaking. The tummy ache came from some digestive problems from eating so little food, so must stock up on senna! The second is that there was an argument in the house so I nervous ate half my salad, and the third is that we went out to eat and I didn't want to miss out on a social opportunity, just because I'm not eating very much.


I'm also in a bad mood today, for random reasons so that may be part of it, but I still haven't been very very bad, just slightly naughty.


Day 5

• rest of my Morrison's salad
• 1/2 bowl of Harvester salad
• 1 bite of chicken burger
• 5 chips
• taste of sirloin steak
• taste of rump steak
• 1 cracker with mackerel pate 

Although I have to say that when looking at this, its doesn't look like much at all, but i did have 2 glasses of wine as well, but I will allow that.

My boyfriend was surprised that he could feel my ribs in my back, so that's a good thing I guess, although I'm a bit sceptical about seeing an results already. I bought my burger home from the Harvester (bar & grill) so will have that for a couple of meals tomorrow.

Thank you darlings,

Emma xx

Photo of before I started...

I am very nervous about putting this photo up, but I wont be like this for long! I will be putting up photos every week to record my progress and also to justify not going on the scales. This is the heaviest I have ever been - I used to be 7st 5lbs and used to run every other day. Going to university has made me put on the extra weight because I haven't had enough time with uni work and jobs to work out and not enough money to buy the right food, but now I have the determination to do so.

And my boyfriend is already telling me that he can see the difference round my hips and tummy since this photo was taken and he should know! He sees me naked more than I do!

So please don't call me lazy or ugly, because I am neither. I am just waiting to feel beautiful again <3

But I'm going to miss the amazing boobs!

Emma x

Day 4

So I know today hasn't finished yet, but I thought I'd do it now so I can go to bed after I eat. I went shopping today, which felt so good because I now don't have to buy the cheapest food because it lasts so much longer, so I can buy less, more expensive food!

One of the other problems you can have is that your blood sugar drops, so I carry a small pot of crystallized fruit around with me just in case I start to feel a bit faint. Also I love to cook, which is annoying when it comes to bigger meals, so today I am sharing fajitas with my house mate and boyfriend, so they can have most of it! 

The other problem is expiry dates, because I am eating so little that I have to try and beat the food to the date, but as my hypnotherapist says "it's waste whether its on your waist, in the toilet or in the bin!". So you have to check expiry dates when you go out and get mostly freezables, and write a list of everything in order of the expiry dates so you know when things need to be eaten by or to go in the bin.

Day 4

• 2 crackers with Boursin
• 10 blueberries
• 1/3 of the smallest salad they have in Morrisons (rest is for breakfast and lunch tomorrow)
• 1/2 a fajita  

So still going strong, making sure I still have regular meals, and am eating at the table!! And getting lots of support from family and friends!! Although some are worried I'll end up starving myself (which I'm not!).

Thank you darlings!

Emma xx

Days 1, 2 and 3.

Right so first entry. Don't expect many people to read this but I want it on here to record my progress so it might help other people. This year I want to transform my life. I am doing this in three ways;

1. No Smoking
2. Getting Slim
3. Changing How I Think

The weight-loss is the biggest thing, but I aim to achieve this while changing how I think. I am doing this with the help of hypnotism and if it works i will be recommending the person I am going to, and so far so good. 

I must also stress that this is not a pro-ana site. I do not have an eating disorder and dont want one, I just want to get healthy and happy!

I would like to keep this quite anonymous in case this isn't successful, but I am determined this time. I have missed you a couple of days so will catch up quickly. Here I will say what I eat and the benefits, but I am not going to weigh myself regularly so look for updates! To start with I was 11st 9lbs, which for my 5ft 3inch frame is overweight. This makes my BMI 29.10 and the range for obese starts at 30, so I am not exaggerating the need to lose weight. I am also 19 and am living in England.

The aim is for each meal to be the size of a golf ball, therefore shrinking your stomach to this size. This has been recommended by a professional, so it's not starving yourself!! Also you must drink lots of water and chew everything 25 times - even soup! (just swish it round your mouth, the saliva breaks it down)

Day 1

• 6 pieces of small sushi
• 2 tempura calamari rings
• 1 wrap (before hypnotism session - don't want to count this but should.)

Day 2

• 3 small pieces of teriyaki salmon
• 2 tempura calamari rings
• 2 blueberries
• 1 lychee

Day 3

• 1 tempura calamari ring
• 1 small piece of chicken 
• 2 olives
• 3 crackers with smoked mackerel pate
• 2 small chilli crackers (to get blood sugar up)

and that's been it so far! 

I do plan on doing some exercise as well soon, just been a bit busy so far! Also haven't smoked in 13 days! :)

Emma x